You are a Muffin By Exeunt Press
Instruments: 2d6
Game Description
This game is about being a small muffin (or different pastry) and looking at all the customers that enter into the cafe before you are chosen and eaten!
Game Content Warnings
These are content warnings that are from the game prompts and are present in all playthroughs.Playthrough Content Warnings
These are content warnings specific to this playthrough only.
Word Count: 1,548 Played: Nov 14, 2022
Name: Ronni
Pastry Type:
Roll: 3, French Macaron, Rose flavor
Description:
A singular pale pink macaron, with two lines of hard icing drizzled atop, with a dried rose petal pressed in the center, and flaked with edible gold leaf.
Roll: 4, The Regular
What do they look like?
A tired looking man with a comb-over and a white beard.
What are they wearing?
Horn rimmed, tortoise shell glasses, and a green bow-tie
Are they relaxed or in a hurry?
They look relaxed
Do they linger or order now?
They order right away, they always get the same drink
What do they bring with them?
A thick book from the library.
Roll: 2 +1 = 3
Flat White
RV 1
Roll: 2, 3 Safe for now ,
He orders a ham and cheese kolache instead.
Roll: 4, South low-top table
They sit and read the book they brought with them and enjoy the time to themselves.
He ate the kolache while reading the thick book.
Roll: 4
He stayed for a while after eating the kolache and nursing the coffee. After he had finished his drink he waved to the staff and said, “I’ll be back tomorrow!”
Roll: 3
Staleness: 3/50
Roll: 3, The Worker
What do they look like?
A tired looking woman with bags under her eyes and her makeup done a little sloppy.
What are they wearing?
She is wearing a blue worker’s vest for the massive store chain.
Are they relaxed or in a hurry?
She is in a hurry and keeps checking her watch.
Do they linger or order now?
She orders immediately.
What do they bring with them?
She has a phone, and her watch but nothing else, not even a purse.
Roll: 7, Latte Macchiato
RV 1
Roll: 6, 1, Safe for now
She orders a croissant with butter.
Roll: 2, South High-top Table
She tapps tapps tapps away on her phone the entire time she is eating, and looks around every once and a while. She seems to be waiting for someone.
She took a long time to eat the croissant and dipped it into the coffee as she ate.
Roll: 3,
No one leaves
Roll: 6
Total: 9/50
Roll: 5, First time Visitor
What do they look like?
A short nervous man with dark hair and broad shoulders.
What are they wearing?
They are wearing clothing that is too large for them and a poor haircut.
Are they relaxed or in a hurry?
They seem extremely anxious but not in a hurry.
Do they linger or order now?
They linger for a long time before ordering.
What do they bring with them?
They have several spiral notebooks and pens of various colors.
Roll: 3, Flat White
RV: 1
Roll: 1, 3, Safe for now
They order a blueberry muffin, a croissant, and a biscotti.
Roll: 6, South Low coffee table
They are drinking slowly and start writing in one of the several notebooks.
He worked his way through all the food slowly, and got up a second time to get more coffee.
Roll: 5, No one leaves
Roll: 4
Total: 13/50
Roll: 5, First time Visitor
What do they look like?
A tall woman with short hair and a cane.
What are they wearing?
She’s wearing large hoop earrings, and a long skirt.
Are they relaxed or in a hurry?
She seems to be relaxed,
Do they linger or order now?
She takes her time before ordering.
What do they bring with them?
She has a messenger bag on her shoulder.
Roll: 2, Steamed Milk
RV: 2
Roll: 2,2, safe for now
She only orders the drink
Roll: 1 North High-top table
She drinks her drink quickly but stays for a while to work on her laptop, which she pulled from her messenger bag.
Her drink is practically gone by the time she sits down and starts typing away.
Roll: 5, No one leaves
Roll: 4
Total: 17/50
Roll: 1, The Writer
What do they look like?
An elderly woman with long thick hair in a ponytail.
What are they wearing?
She’s wearing a business suit with the top button unbuttoned
Are they relaxed or in a hurry?
She is in a hurry and taps her foot while waiting in line
Do they linger or order now?
She orders immediately
What do they bring with them?
She has a briefcase, a laptop, and an accordion folder.
Roll: 7, Latte Macchiato
RV: 2
Roll: 1,6, Safe for now
She orders a croissant with her drink.
Seat: 2 South High-top Table
She sits across from the worker and they begin to talk, the older woman taking out the laptop and typing the entire time.
She eats slowly and seems to forget that she even has food half the time before taking small bites.
Roll: 3 No one leaves
Roll: 6
Total: 23/50
Roll: 1, The Writer
What do they look like?
A young person with dyed hair, piercings and torn clothes.
What are they wearing?
Their clothing looks old, but in a chic way. They are covered in smudges of ink and pencil.
Are they relaxed or in a hurry?
They are relaxed
Do they linger or order now?
They linger looking over the options and counting their money.
What do they bring with them?
A small pencil case and one tiny little notebook.
Roll: 2, Steamed Milk
RV: 2
Roll: 2, 6
They order the blueberry macarons.
Seat: 3, North Low Top table
They are sitting by themselves and immediately take out the notebook to start scribbling something in it.
They inhale the macaron and wait a long time until the coffee has practically gone cold before drinking it.
Roll: 2
The worker and the writer stand up, shake hands, and both leave out the door with one another.
Roll: 4
Total: 27/50
Roll: 3, The Worker
What do they look like?
A tall middle aged man.
What are they wearing?
A button up shirt, pressed pants, and shiny shoes.
Are they relaxed or in a hurry?
They are pretty relaxed
Do they linger or order now?
He lingers and takes his time looking over all the pastries and drinks.
What do they bring with them?
He hasn’t brought anything other than his wallet.
Roll: 4 Cappuccino
RV: 3
Roll: 5, 4, Safe for now
They order a simple biscuit.
Seat: 6, South low coffee table
He tries to strike up a conversation with the nervous man, but it doesn’t go anywhere. The nervous man keeps responding in simple one word sentences, and eventually the worker takes the hint.
He takes his time eating the biscuit and coffee.
Roll: 4
No one leaves
Roll: 3
Total: 30/50
Roll: 1, The Writer
What do they look like?
A large short woman, with curly hair, and half moon glasses.
What are they wearing?
They are wearing a cardigan and sneakers.
Are they relaxed or in a hurry?
She is pretty relaxed
Do they linger or order now?
She knows exactly what she wants and orders immediately.
What do they bring with them?
She has her purse, phone and laptop.
Roll: 5, Caffe Americano
RV: 3
Roll: 1, 6
She orders two chocolate muffins
Seat: 1, North High-top table
She sits across from the other writing, pulls out her laptop and starts to get to work immediately.
She eats one muffin as soon as she’s settled and picks at the other one while she is writing.
Roll: 5
No one leaves
Roll: 3
Total: 33/50
Roll: 5, First Time visitor
What do they look like?
An average height person, with short hair and long nails.
What are they wearing?
They are wearing many chunky necklaces and bracelets.
Are they relaxed or in a hurry?
They seem to be in a hurry
Do they linger or order now?
But they don’t know what they want so they linger looking and deciding on everything.
What do they bring with them?
They have 3 books with them and a laptop.
Roll: 4, Cappuccino
RV: 3
Roll: 1, 2, ME!
They ordered one singular rose macaron: me!
Seat: 5 North Low coffee table
They sit down on the couch by themselves, splay their books across the table, pull up the laptop and start typing.
How fresh are you?
Not as fresh as I once was, but still not yet stale. 30/50 freshness
How did you taste?
Delicate, refined, and just a hint of sweetness. Perfect to wash down with the coffee.
Did they enjoy you?
Yes, but they thought I was a little overpriced. They aren’t certain they would order another one, but they don’t regret buying me.