A Fool's Errand By Mike Free

Instruments: Deck of Cards

Game Description 

You are the jester to the king, the only one with the freedom to mock, shame, and bring to light the foolishness of others without consequences. There is a grave conspiracy afoot and you are the only one with the ability to warn your liege.

Game Content Warnings 

These are content warnings that are from the game prompts and are present in all playthroughs.

Playthrough Content Warnings 

These are content warnings specific to this playthrough only.

Game Playthrough

Word Count: 1,104      Played: Nov 19, 2023


The King

7 of Spades: A respected General 

The Conspiracy

2 of Spades: Kill the King 

9 of Diamonds

Huey Latos, A doctor needs subjects for research, Neutral Party

-Came dressed in his doctor’s apron and asked for more bodies to dissect. 

-If he had time to visit the king he must not have many patients and must not be any good. 

Court was middling 

8 of Clubs

Eliotte Quarto, A Lord wishing to settle a land dispute, unaware of the conspiracy

-He was a very old and sickly man who coughed every 30 seconds into a silk handkerchief.

-Since he was old the land wouldn’t be his for long and it would go to his son, who apparently wasn't competent enough to get land for himself. 

Court did not approve but the king laughed. 

7 of Diamonds

Keely Palacio, a bishop who wants a new church, a neutral party

- Came in full regalia and tried to speak using complicated language and obscure words

-Said there would be no point to a new church if no one could understand what he was saying anyway

Court was middling 

Ace of Clubs

Cletus Santullli - an advisor looking for approval of the budget for a coming festival, Unaware of the conspiracy

-Stern, small faced, wearing clothing that no longer fit

- Said the king needed to double check the line items for sex workers and weed

Court approved but king didn’t

4 of Diamonds

Nona Sillman - A famous musician hoping to get commissioned, a neutral party

-She played a song for the king and asked for patronage

-Made a joke about how if she married me then it would be two jesters for the price of one

No one laughed.

King of Diamonds

The King addressed the court speaking on matters of war and how to defend the kingdom

-Made a joke that the doctor would be thankful for all the dead bodies

King snorted but largely didn’t care

King of Hearts

The King addressed the court speaking on matters of the betrothal of his daughter. 

-Said he should commission a silk bag for her to put over her partner’s head so she can stand to be around him. 

No one laughed except for the mother of the partner

Jack of Diamonds 

Kitty Wesby - A general, brought news of troop movement, A neutral Party 

-She had one eye and a shaved head and stood only 3ft tall

-Made a joke about how sad I’ll be that we have to rebudget the festival to remove the sex workers and weed for the war

Everyone but Kitty laughed

King of Clubs 

The King addresses the court on the matter of utility for mobilizing the troops.

-Made a joke that we shouldn’t forget to bring the coffin makers

There was a middling response from the court

Jack of Clubs 

Kitty Wesby - A general, brought news of troop movement, A neutral Party

-She requested that we withdraw the troops from the coast and bring them inland

-Joked about how we’ll become a pirate nation when the raiders come and take over

The king wasn’t amused


I make a largely joking reveal that Kitty is working with the kingdom to the south and how she wants us to move troops away from the coast so that it will be easier for us to be invaded and how she’ll kill him on the trip to the battlefield to the north. 

The king and all the courtiers laugh as it’s a joke and no one takes me seriously.

5 of Hearts 

Kory Dies - a revolutionary who demands a constitution, Loyal to the King

-She speaks about how the people will be more persuaded to join the king’s new war if they know that they have rights and privileges that other countries don’t

-Make a joke that we can’t imprison the entire country for not agreeing with everything the king does. 

Everyone laughed except Kory

8 of Diamonds

Eliotte Quarto, A Lord wishing to settle a land dispute, A neutral Party

-He has returned with his daughter to both petition on their side of a land dispute

-Make a joke that because we haven’t heard the other side that they must know that they are in the wrong

About half the court laughs

6 of Diamonds

Albina Orts, a smuggler awaiting judgment, a neutral party 

-They were caught along the coast and brought up as an example to the king of what’s happening with the raiders

- Joked that if we allowed all the raiders into the country that we would have plenty of booze for the festival

No one laughed again

9 of Hearts

Huey Latos, A doctor needs subjects for research, Loyal to the king

-Implored that by better understanding the anatomy of people that he will treat the soldiers better

-Joked that he was a warmonger since he wanted more people dead to experiment on

Everyone but the king laughed

Queen of Diamonds

Marvin Poythress - a duke from a neighboring country looking to woo the king’s cousin

-He was dressed in fancy silk robes and many jewels with many feathers

-Said he must have asked every member of the family to give him their finest clothes so he could look at least somewhat presentable before the king

Everyone laughed

4 of Clubs 

Nona Sillman - A famous musician hoping to get commissioned , Unaware of the conspiracy

-Asked to be commissioned for an anthem for the kings deeds in the upcoming war

-Joked that she didn’t even have to wait, she could just make stuff up because people would believe her

The king did not laugh

Jack of Hearts

Kitty Wesby - A general, brought news of troop movement, Loyal to the King

-She petitioned the king for better equipment for the infantry. 

-Made a joke that a poor workman blames their tools and if she were really competent they could be using slingshots 

The king laughed but only about half of the court did

7 of Hearts

Keely Palacio, a bishop who wants a new church, Loyal to the king

-Implored the king that a new church would help improve the moral of the 

-Joked that seeing the bishop in fancy clothes and gold will help make people want to fight so the bishop can get more fancy clothes and gold

Everyone laughed but the bishop 

Joker, 2

The King was murdered in his sleep by an assassin. This came as a shock as I hadn’t seen any of the signs I usually would have. I have no idea who or how this happened. 

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